Excused for the Day

Today is not going to be like the celebratory scene depicting the end of Operation Desert Storm in Jarhead. "Fight the Power" by Public Enemy blaring from boomboxes while Marines revel in this moment of victory, a victory over something, some enemy, maybe death. The adequacy of this soundtrack is irony in its most glaring and perfect form. What exactly are we celebrating here?

Birthdays are events to some, moments to others, and cause for celebration to most. It's a time to throw your arms up in the air in pure rebellion against tasks and chores. Sheep costumes are torn off and wolves prowl the otherwise calm streets they roam on "regular" days. My thoughts on this spectacle are most eloquently summed up here.

The same goes for so many other things that seem to infatuate so many. I promise you that I tried to listen to Jay-Z's new album, but it just did nothing for me. The fact that this same album is going to be in stores on my birthday, and that I've been listening to this man for over a decade, makes sense with the repetitive nature of the topic at hand. I'm just not who I was when these things were cause for excitement. My attempt at falling in line with trending topics having failed I executed the album by deleting it from my computer. People change, and not just on the exterior through new wardrobes and haircuts. People genuinely change.

I know, I'm not even 30 yet. But trust me, the ordeal gets repetitive. Your birthday should allow some leeway to quit the annual performance and bow out gracefully from the young man's/woman's game that is getting shitfaced. Friends will try to light a fire under your ass, but it's midweek and you don't really want the complementary hangover that comes with these things. Yet for all the entitlement that comes with birthdays there is no escaping some responsibilities. Certain people need to be pleased by assuring themselves that they are pleasing you. These are usually the people that are around you most often and they deserve your full cooperation for going out of their way to make sure you're happy. It helps that it's never painful to be around these people because you love them.

Expectations are something you'll want to discard on your birthday. There's no point in setting yourself up for disillusionment on a day that should be navigated on autopilot. Let someone else take the wheel and enjoy the scenery as much as possible. Today is not the day to prove to Instagram that you're the funnest person in the world because: a) you're probably not, and b) you should really stop thinking about other people all the time. Hell, I really want a 24 hour foot rub and fried food today. That's not picturesque. Know yourself, it's a gift from you to you.

This all probably sounds like heresy to the properly trained social butterfly and his/her army of hornets, but they'll get it one day. I've been around long enough to figure out that the uber-celebratory person is never as content as the easy going birthday zen master. The latter will not put himself in uncomfortable situations, the former always will. No one likes upset birthday guy/girl, or weeping birthday guy/girl, or "let's go out and start a brawl/ it's really fucking dangerous to be around me" birthday guy/girl. Today is the best day to avoid doing something you don't feel like doing. It's probably the most important thing to keep in mind.

One of the better things that comes with age is the understanding that there is no solid answer to most things outside of the scientific and mathematical. You know, those things that matter to you on a daily basis. I still have no idea what it is that I am exactly celebrating today, but I can suggest that you have as much fun as you want and refuse to be taken as a prisoner of expectation. Once again, know yourself, everything else is too much of a burden on this day. The rest is up to you or people you trust.

-Alex Moran